Let Me Know
by DryadSpeaks
Summary: aka Word Vomit, Artie-Style.  Sequel to "Everything I've Always Wanted to Tell You."  Artie's response to her letter.


**A/N: This story is the sequel to "Everything I've Always Wanted to Tell You." If you haven't read that, it might be a good idea to read it first so you know what's going on. :-) **

**It was a loooong day at work today, so please excuse any parts of this that seem a bit incoherent. OR...look at those parts as a deep insight into Artie's word vomit. I myself suffer from that, so I know how it goes. hahaha**

**As usual, DO NOT own Glee.**

Dear Quinn,

Wow.

When I saw your name on the envelope, I immediately threw out all my other mail by accident. Then I realized what I had done, and got it back. Good thing, too...apparently I have relatives that send me things for my birthday.

Before I get going here, I'm just going to come out and say that this letter probably won't make much sense. Eloquence is not something I've ever been known for. But then...you already know that.

I can't even really begin describe what your letter did to me. Things haven't been going so well lately...and (not to sound like some sort of sad excuse for a lunatic from a bad romance novel) your letter was like a bright shining beacon at the end of my tunnel.

Again...not to sound melodramatic or anything, but I might have been crying by the time I got to the end. Seriously. I'm pretty sure that was the most beautiful letter anyone has received. Ever.

So...now that I've filled almost a page and still haven't actually said anything, maybe I should get a move on with that. I don't know how much of this I could tell you if you were here in front of me, so I thought it best to write it all out. Well...I thought it best to write some of it out. All of it would probably scare you away.

Let me start by saying this: please don't ever feel like you need to apologize to me for how you acted when we were younger. You did what you had to do to survive...and so did I. And look...we both came out of it relatively unscathed! (although...that pair of pants I was wearing the first time they threw me in the dumpster was never the same again...)

When I first went back to school after my accident, I didn't know how people were going to react. I hoped that everything would be the same, that all my friends would realize that I was still the same, even if I was different. Of course, that fantasy lasted all of three seconds. The moment the first kid looked at me when my dad was helping me out of the van, I knew I was in trouble. I don't remember who it was (actually...it might have been Puck, now that I think about it...), but it made me feel like I just wanted to lie down somewhere and die.

And then I saw you. You said in your letter that you felt like it was your duty to watch over me...do you know that the tiny smile you gave me that day made me realize that everything was going to be ok?

Sometimes I wished that you would come over and talk to me, but I always understood that you couldn't. You were popular...and I was the lowest of the low.

When we got to middle school, the counsellors assured me it would be different. They said there were lots of kids in wheelchairs at the school, and that I wouldn't stick out as much as I did in elementary school. They said maybe I could make some new friends, and I got hopeful. What I didn't realize was that "lots" actually meant "two," and that neither one of them wanted anything to do with a nerdy kid that was new to the school. That's right...even the OTHER kids in wheelchairs thought they were above me.

I used to catch glimpses of you walking behind me in the halls, but I always just thought it was coincidence. It would never have entered my mind that someone like you was looking out for someone like me. I used to wish that my seat had been behind yours in the classes we shared, just so I could take you in. (...because that doesn't make me sound like a creepy voyeur at all...)

After years of torment, high school almost came as a relief. Sure...I was still a target for everyone looking to tear someone else down to make themselves feel better, but suddenly there were targets on everyone's backs, not just mine. It was a lot easier to blend in and disappear in such a large crowd.

My high school career had three highlights. The first two were jazz band and glee club, and the friends I made there. The third highlight repeated itself every time you and I were paired for a number in glee. Yeah, corny...I know. But also true. Quinn, those moments were some of the most cherished memories I have of my life so far.

I've thought about you so much since we graduated, but never had the courage to write you, for fear that you would write me off as just another loser. I don't think I could have handled that.

Geez, if we had both known how the other felt, we could have saved ourselves a whole lot of heartache, couldn't we?

(Did I just say heartache?)

Please excuse this rather long and confusing pile of word vomit that I have stuffed in an envelope and sent back to you. You know me...that's how I roll.

You said in your letter you could write me a book, and well...I think I could write you a whole series of books. Sure, they'd be awkward and weird...much like this letter, but at least then you'd know how I feel.

I think we should get together, wipe the slate clean, and start again. Let me know...

Love,

Artie

**A/N 2: I hope you enjoyed that. PersonallyI think this is what it would sound like if Artie were just left to his own devices to fill a couple of pages with his thoughts.**

**So, I've decided to write Artie's response to Quinn's letter as a one-shot, and then maybe I'll write a separate multi chapter fic about the two of them.**

**At first I thought maybe I'd write the letter and then have subsequent chapters when they get together, but I don't really like that idea anymore. It seems too disjointed. **

**Thoughts always welcome as reviews or pms!**


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